Oooh! I could crush an Ape!

With Rise of the Planet of the Apes hitting screens today, we celebrate five great apes on film. Each accompanied, for no good reason, by a bonus joke, so you can entertain your friends when the conversation dries up down t'pub. Okay, so they're not very good, but I don't care. I'm on holiday at the minute - my trained chimp is posting this.

1. King Kong as seen in King Kong

Q. Why did King Kong join the army?
A. To learn about gorilla warfare

2. King Louie as seen in The Jungle Book

Q. What do you call an ape who works in a call centre?
A. A who-rang-utang!

3. Clyde as seen in Every Which Way But Loose and Any Which Way You Can

Q. What's white and sweet and swings through the trees?
A. A meringuetan!

4. Cheetah as seen in those old Tarzan films

Q: How do chimps get down the stairs?

A: They slide down the banana-ster! 

5. Sal Minella as seen in the Muppet movies

Q: What's Sal's favourite cookie?

A: Chocolate chimp!

Speaking of Muppets, I wonder what Waldorf and Statler thought of this post?